The FREAKS have arrived!!!
And even though they are freaks, we are freaks, they are super cute. So first let me explain....
As you will recall, my lovely husband Lang from Texas returned to Seldovia with us after his show in Anchorage. My goal was to have him breed with Beave, which he did after some time. I had everything planned down to the second because we humans/breeders are a dumb and trusting lot; in us you can see the triumph of hope over experience. I knew exactly when I would encourage him and Beave to mate to ensure a wonderful summer litter of kittens.
To that end, I kept them separate. I had Beave in the giant cat condo. I put Lang in his stud pants, which are supposed to keep him from spraying his man pee all over. I was talking to Mark as he cooked dinner, not thinking at all about the dangers that lurked in those pants.
Then I heard it: that unmistakable sound of cat mating. I ran upstairs to see Teeny rolling on the floor, looking quite pleased with herself. If you'll recall, Teeny is not an oriental shorthair; she is a devon. She was not in heat at all. I had just spent many days with her and she indicated not one ounce of longing for sex. Well well. And there's Lang, still in his pants, looking like Lang, in his pants.
I cried and cried. Mark told me that I shouldn't be surprised: he was certainly not the first man to have sex with his pants on. That kind of made me mad too. Men.
After I stopped crying, I remembered that cats are spontaneous ovulators, that they release eggs after mating, which is why they can have babies in the same litter with different daddies. So I shipped Teeny up to Shrek and had them spend some quality time together. I figured if she must be pregnant, which I didn't want, then at least she could have some devons for me.
Fast forward 64 days and you will observe the results of the previous tale: 5 freak babies. They bear no resemblance to devons. Their hair is longer and was standing up when they came out. Teeny is the best mom in the world. She's fertile; she takes care of the babies; the cords; the placentas (yum); and nurses them all while giving birth to more. I am a bad woman.